The day
has finally arrived! Today, I completed my last day of Capstone and therefore
ended my career as an IU nursing student. As I write this, I cannot seem to
find the words to express what I am feeling, but I will do my best. I am proud,
ecstatic, and relieved, but I am also feeling nostalgic.
As I was
leaving at the end of the day and walking down the halls of Bloomington
Hospital for the very last time, hundreds of memories flooded my brain at once.
I remembered being terrified of taking patients’ vital signs the first few days
I spent at the hospital and asking the nurse to go in the rooms with me “just
to make sure I was doing everything correctly”.
I remembered setting up an IV piggyback for the first time and spilling
the medication on the floor right in front of my instructor and my patient. I
can even still remember what medication it was. (Avelox, just in case you were
wondering…)
I
remembered exchanging stories of success and misfortunate with fellow nursing
students, sometimes laughing at each other’s mistakes while other times
congratulating each other on a job well done. I remembered the look of relief
on multiple patients’ faces and the words of gratitude they expressed towards
me for doing something for them as simple as helping them bathe and change
their gowns. I remembered laughing and joking with my patients and their
families and sharing in their happiness when they found out they could go home.
I remembered comforting a family member of a dying patient during a shift on
critical care and letting her know that grieving is normal and okay. I remembered
being her shoulder to cry on, literally, as she came to terms with her loved
one’s prognosis. I remembered the moment I realized what nursing truly means
and being frightened, empowered, and exhilarated all at once.
Nursing
is giving yourself entirely to people you hardly know. It is missing your lunch
break because you are feeding your patient who cannot feed herself. It is
missing your bathroom break because you are assisting your patient with using
the restroom. Nursing is thinking about your patients long after your shift has
ended and wondering how they are doing. Nursing
is accepting that every person is different, in good ways and in bad ways, but
treating them the same. It is seeing someone in distress or in pain and feeling
absolutely helpless but compelled to do something to help anyway. Nursing is
mentally, physically, and emotionally demanding work that goes unappreciated by
many but is praised repeatedly by those who do value the work nurses do. Nursing
is the most intimate profession-you see some people in their weakest states of
mind, body, and spirit, while you see others at their strongest. It is the
profession I am proud to say I have chosen to make my life’s work.
As I
reflect upon all of the memories I have made while in the IU School of Nursing,
I realize with great joy how far I have come since those first days when
getting vital signs and practicing injections on gel pads were intimidating
tasks. My classmates and I have grown so much, and we could not be more ready
to move on to the next phase of our lives. We could stick around here for a
while longer and make more memories, but we would cease to grow. The time has
come for us to see what we can learn from the real world.
Thank
you, IUSON, for enabling us to grow as individuals, team members, and
professionals and for making our time here so unforgettable.
“I
believe that anyone can conquer fear by doing the things he fears to do,
provided he keeps doing them until he gets a record of successful experience
behind him.”-Eleanor Roosevelt
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